parents ,children, grandchildren.

Since april the 20th I stay with my son and his family in New Jersey, usa.
Since his father ,and my husband, died, 6 years ago, i try to come every year for a few months, to be with them and especially since the arrival of 2 wonderful grandchildren , Isabella and Alec, that has been -and always is- very inspiring.
Difficult too, at times.

If you visit for a day, or may be, for a weekend all the "parties" do usually their utmost best to give each other a time, as pleasant as possible.
If you stay longer, as in my case, you see each other in all sorts of moods and not only in the best! Sometimes the "mother in me" is worried about what she sees in her sons life, sometimes that makes her keep her mouth shut, and on the other hand there is "the grandmother in me", called "oma" by all of them; that is the dutch word for grandma.
"Oma" is the opposite of the "silent mother" and talks a lot with the grandchildren; sometimes very much aware of what she says, other times her lack of knowledge of the impact of the english words makes her "unaware" and in the eyes of son and d.i.l. not always as reponsible as they would like to see "oma".
So then my children become not only the teaching parens of their child, but at the same time teaching grownups to this grandma. Like that they are already part of the so-called "sandwich generation".

One thing is certain: you never stop being a mother or a parent. But with children reaching the age of 40... you become a silent parent- in the background. Very different from the parent I once was, the "teaching and guiding" mother. But hen again, with my grandchildren that "role' is partially back for me, and I love it. I can't deny that. And in my heart I hope I 'm in a positive way part of this process of sowing and harvesting.
To do what once inspired me and was the'motto' on the Petit Larousse Dictionary; "Je seme avec tout vent".


Dag,dag
the horse-rider.